I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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