Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Randomize