is your mom at the bar?
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Randomize
