we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
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