...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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