Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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