doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
