I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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