bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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