Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
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