i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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