Your tits are I can't wait for
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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