What did we do last night that was yellow?
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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