8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Randomize
