I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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