the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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