I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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