One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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