apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
love makes seman taste better
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
