My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
