I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag