I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
