i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize