The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
