No, drunk sperm still make babies.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
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