Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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