I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Sober January is a disaster.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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