I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Randomize
