Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Randomize
