Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize