He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
