Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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