I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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