even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
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