you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
We had to coat check the pizza.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
