Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
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