allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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