he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize