Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
