Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
