All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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