Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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