if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
wow bdsm is so cute
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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