I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
