she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
