wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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