Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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