Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
