I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
