thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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