i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize